Michaels Birth

This whole blog is aimed at helping parents raise up athletes in their lives.  I am excited to not only start writing this blog from observation but from experience.  I am SO pleased, excited, and proud to announce Trevor Michael Hester has been born.  I don’t know if he will be athletic, musical, or academic. He may be none of the above, God has created Michael for a purpose and that purpose is what I want to see lived out in my son! 

Michael had a very interesting entrance into this world and I want to share the entire story for those interested.  This is a long post and very personal.  If you are looking for a normal posting of mine, those will resume, following a walk through this first part of our precious ones journey.

IT ALL STARTED ON FRIDAY

 

 

Friday at 11:00am.   We have a scheduled doctor’s appointment and ultrasound.  Melanie was experiencing some swelling, carpal tunnel in her wrist, and what seemed to be a strained muscle in her upper right abdomen, other than this the pregnancy was going great and she was feeling well.  Upon arrival I immediately found the manliest magazine I could in a women’s doctor office (had to check 3 tables before I found an ESPN Mag) and started reading and talking with Melanie about Arsenal and how awesome they are.  During the ultrasound we saw our baby’s little feet, hands, head, and everything looked good.  Head was bigger than the body, but that was perfectly normal at this point and so we moved onto the appointment with the doctor. 

Our normal OB (Dr. Ryan) was out of town and so we had Dr. Boydsden. We spoke about the strained muscle, the carpal tunnel, the swelling, I mentioned preeclampsia and asked what the signs were so that I could better look for them since Melanie’s two older sisters experienced that awfulness in different ways. The doctor explained there are three types of preeclampsia, one is bad, one is very bad, the last and least common (1 in 40,000) is not really preeclampsia, but it is really close and is REALLY bad and life threatening.  We discussed everything else including the ultra sound and she said, “Everything looks great, we need to start setting up two week appointments.  I quickly scanned the rest of my manly article and got up to depart. I was up and ready to leave when Melanie asked if the urinalysis had gotten back yet.

Dr. Boydsden checked it over and with a quizzical look told us that it had and Melanie should take some more tests due to some protein found in her urine.  She said head over to the triage area of delivery so they can run the test again and take some blood on our way out so that they can rule out preeclampsia and just put the test down as dehydration or a missed test. 

The walk over to the hospital was slightly nerve wracking as something wasn’t 100% correct and I always like my wife to be healthy and beautiful, as she is.  Still, we were joking around the whole time and had a great walk talking about the size of our little guy and what we had to do over the next 2.5 months to get ready for his delivery. We took our time, but I had to get to work and she had some work to finish unpacking from our trip that we got back from on Thursday night.  What we didn’t know yet is that this would be our last walk side by side for a week…

 

We got to triage and set up in a room with a TV… I found Curious George and settled in to watch one episode while the tests took place.  They took Melanies blood, another urinalysis, and told us to wait a bit.  The nurse mentioned the tests at the hospital are usually a little more accurate and quicker so that is probably why we were sent over here by Dr. Boydsden.  We sat and watched TV and joked around…

THEN THE SCARIEST WEEKEND OF MY LIFE STARTED WITH THE SCARIEST HOUR OF MY LIFE

The nurses came in and explained that Dr. Boydsden had ordered an IV and that we were going to start the hospital admission process because there was some things showing up on the test that were “not normal.” Dr. Boydsden was on her way over and the high risk OB at the hospital was called into talk to us.  I was curious what was going on and started to get a little worked up because I wanted to do anything I could to protect my wife and unborn child.  I wanted to get all the answers and fix things, if that meant Melanie was on bed rest for the next little bit, I would do the dishes, I would do the laundry, everything I could to make sure she rested. 

I like bluntness, don’t beat around the bush, just tell me what is going on.  Dr. Boydsden did just that. She came in and stated, “Remember we talked about the 3 types of preeclampsia? You have the third kind we talked about. Your platelets should be at 150,000 and they are at 52,000.  If they drop more we will need to look at doing a transfusion.  The pain in your right side was not a muscle, but your liver starting to shut down.” The pain in Melanie’s side had been there for 6 days!

Then Dr. Martin, the hospital’s high risk OB, came in.  She was extremely kind and also told us how things were.  She said, “You are going to have a baby this weekend.” It turns out the only cure for HELLP Syndrome is delivery of the baby.  She mentioned that their concern at this point was the mothers life.

I wish somebody had told me that if I went and beat Usain Bolt in a sprint that Melanie would be fine.  Or even ask me to broker peace in the Middle East.  I could at least attempt those things. I could try, I could do something.  As it was.

I COULD DO NOTHING.

What I heard is that your wife is dying, we don’t know about the baby, and THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO.  I wanted so badly to do something; tell me how to fix it!

There was nothing, I could only do the natural thing.  I wept like a little girl.

The nurses went to work making sure Melanie was admitted and set up with the medications she needed and we listened to Dr. Martin and asked questions.  Melanie was amazing, so strong and encouraging.  The NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) doctor came in (who happened to be the husband of Dr. Martin) and told us that survival rate for Michael was 96% but that it would be an uphill battle.  Would I have to make a decision about my wife or my child at some point or go forward with Michael and not have somebody who is and will be the most amazing wife and mother alongside me?

Then we discussed the dance.  To give Michael the best chance possible we needed to keep him in the womb and give Melanie shots in the butt (even amongst my tears I made jokes about that) of steroids to help develop his lungs for 48 hours. If we took longer than 48 hours Melanie would start declining.  For now her numbers were holding steady so we started the dance.

Parents were called and both sets started heading to CO.  My parents by air, Melanie’s by car. Another ultrasound was ordered and Melanie needed some rest so I decided to go get things from home for the next couple of days. The whole time out of the hospital, I wrestled with God.  I pleaded with Him.  I tried to make deals with Him.  I told Him what I wanted. 

I finally rested in the fact that God is sovereign, and God is good. 

That doesn’t mean I was going to get the perfect outcome, all it meant was that I could do nothing and God had to do everything.  I wasn’t going to blame Him for anything, this wasn’t His fault.  He was not happy this was happening. This was not a test, God wanted everything to be perfect. I had to remember He was in charge and for whatever reason was allowing Melanie and myself to go through this.  He was going to do what was best, no matter what happened to Melanie and Michael.  Did I like all these conclusions? Were they easy? They still aren’t. 

I very loudly told God what I wanted, I told Him what I thought about Him letting us go through this, and I told Him what I thought about the situation in general.  I expressed my pain, my fear, and my anger to God.  Then I got back to the hospital…

When I got back Melanie was connected to a catheter, she had an IV, was getting magnesium and looked beautiful. I was so proud with everything she had done that day.  It was tough for me as the protector to see her set up like this and yet I knew this was only the beginning.

By that time it was 8pm, we talked for a bit about everything, finally had a chance to debrief.  It was an amazing time where nothing else mattered besides my princess and the future prince.  I didn’t think about camps, about support, about ANYTHING, except how to support the people that God gave me to serve and protect.

We “shut the lights out” around 11 pm, twelve hours after we walked into the earlier doctor’s appointment.  The Nurses came in hourly to check urine output (they were worried about liver and kidneys) and play with the IV.  I didn’t sleep that night for two reasons -- One, any noise Melanie made I checked on and took action if I could. Two, have you tried to sleep on one of those hospital “beds”?

Saturday the dance continued...  I never really woke up because I never really went to sleep.  Melanie was stable and her platelets went from 52,000 to 58,000.  This was because of the steroids and it is normal for that much gain.  The anesthesiologist, who was a nephew of a good friend of the Rhodes through Awana, was amazing and made sure he explained the issues.  If we tried an epidural and there was bleeding without clotting there could be too much pressure put on the spine and cause paralysis or worse. If we didn’t get an epidural then we would have to put Melanie completely under and that would mean Michael would also be knocked out and that is very dangerous for somebody who may not have developed lungs.  It could cause Michael to not be able to breathe. Breathing is important for humans, even babies.

We saw all the doctors and they were amazing! Test after test was taken and we had to track everything, including urine output.  Melanie did a great job with peeing, so I nicknamed her The Urinator. Feel free to use that in the future. Melanie wasn’t able to eat due to the ever present threat of an emergency C-section to save her life, but was still doing an amazing job.

In the afternoon the families arrived.  The Rhodes and Hesters were both there to help “their babies” in any way possible.  They were SOOOOO amazing. It was a blessing to have both sets of parents there and coming alongside us.  As we talked with them we realized there were prayers for Melanie and Michael happening all over the globe -- from the Philippines, Ukraine, Boston, Florida, Seattle, California, Korea, and Zimbabwe.  God’s people came together on our behalf and I cannot tell you how encouraging it was to see your messages and know EACH OF YOU were praying for us.  You were a blessing to us.  Yes, the parents were a huge blessing because they were there, but your prayers, your love, your encouragement was also a major blessing.  THANK YOU!

The rest of Saturday was waiting… my parents and I left to chat and get some grub.  New York strip steak for $6 at the cafeteria… don’t mind if I do.

After eating we went back up and got to visit with some friends who had immediately come over without waiting. You know who you are, thank you!

After everybody left Melanie and I were watching NCIS. The tests came back on her platelets, they were up to 89,000.

THIS WAS A MIRACLE.

Our nurse, Katie, said that in 13 years of being at this job, she had never seen a women with HELLP Syndrome increase more than the 7,000 we saw earlier.  Melanie’s numbers jumped 30,000. The other nurse who has a very strong faith herself agreed that this was because of the prayer that was being put forth on our behalf, and that this was a miracle.  I was praising God left and right.  Dr. Danny (sorry if you are reading this) wanted to wait until the morning to put the epidural in so that it couldn’t get “rubbed out” in the middle of the night. 

Dr. Martin said we would check in the morning and as long as they had not gone down, then we would put in the epidural and start labor around 10 am.  I was going to have a son very shortly.

That night we slept a bit better, but not much.  I would say three hours of sleep was better than the 30 minutes the night before. 

The next morning saw more of God’s amazing provision.

When the tests came back for Melanie her platelets had gone up to 118,000!

The doctors did an amazing job giving Melanie the epidural and getting her prepped to try a vaginal delivery.  They wanted to do things vaginally as a C-section could still cause many complications with bleeding, at least she and baby would both be awake!

We rolled into the delivery room and realized… WE HAD NO IDEA WHAT WE WERE DOING! We were supposed to go to birthing classes this coming Saturday.  How was I going to help Melanie breathe and help our baby without any knowledge? To help us our nurse brought in a video and TV as we started to wait for Melanie’s body to react to the tools of inducement.  The video was a classic 1970’s La Maz video. We did a much better job of making fun of the hair and outfits then we did actually learning anything. There were times at the beginning where Melanie slept and there just happened to be a soccer game on TV…

After a couple of hours Melanie started feeling contractions and was 6 cm dilated.  I started walking her through the breathing techniques that the video didn’t show me, but that my parents did.  At least they didn’t demonstrate like the video!

Melanie’s mom was in the room with us the whole time and so I was able to update the rest of the family as things progressed.  Sandee was a blessing to both Melanie and I during that time.  We were waiting for things to really kick into gear with Melanie being hooked up to Pitocin and the doctor being ready to let her water leak out, not all at once due to the way Michael was sitting, but just let it leak out slowly.

I know this is already getting long, but I want to give a shout out to Melanie.  SHE WAS AMAZING! For the things that her body was doing to her, she should have been miserable, irritated, rude, and generally unpleasant.  She was the exact opposite.  She really showed her true mettle throughout the weekend and I couldn’t be prouder or more pleased!

Around 5:45 pm the nurse and doctor noticed Melanie stopped being The Urinator.  The dance was nearing its end.  The steroids had done their job and now Melanie was starting to show signs of the HELLPs attacking again.  The contractions were not progressing enough, Melanie’s kidneys were shutting down quickly, and the baby monitors were showing Michael was starting to lose his levels of oxygen that had been doing so good.  It was time for a C-section.

By 6:00pm I was in my full bunny suit (photographic evidence has been deleted) and we were headed to the operating room.  Everybody got prepped and I was able to come in and sit next to Melanie.  I tried to make the process as cool as possible.  I talked with her the whole time and told her stories of my childhood while the amazing anesthesiologist made sure Melanie was doing good, the whole room was discussing the NBA finals and their vacations as they sliced and diced, it was totally surreal to be a part of the conversation while they were operating on Melanie.  After a bit, the delivery doctor said here comes the baby, I jumped up and think I caught a glimpse of Melanie’s gall bladder before Michael arrived.  Seeing them hold up a baby and knowing God created that child for and from me and Melanie was the best feeling I have ever had. 

THEN HE CRIED!

In that single cry all my pent up fears and emotions started to be healed.

I watched them work on Michael and got to see Melanie kiss him. Then Michael, myself, and 5 NICU nurses headed to his new home! I told Melanie I loved her and followed the nurses out.  The grandparents were waiting for us as we went to the NICU, I was beaming and showing him off, telling them Melanie was safe for now and they were feeling good about the delivery.  Michael was set up with the whole works, incubator, breathing tube, IV tube.  He looked like a mess.

I didn’t care how he looked.  My baby boy was with me.  God answered your prayers!

After a bit, I ran back over to Melanie and made sure she was ok.  Everything was good, there was no extra bleeding, there was no complications.  She was recovering and could even drink some water!

God answered all of your prayers!

I was overjoyed, exhausted, overwhelmed, and joyous.  I give all praise and glory to God. 

Here’s the truth, God came to our rescue.  This is His story for us.  I know many people who have gone through similar situations and they have not had the same outcome.  I am thankful that God has blessed us with the outcome we got.  No matter the outcome God would get praise and glory.  God is good, no matter what.  I could still be mad at God for His allowing us to go through this, but that wouldn’t change that God is good.  I don’t know why He works the way He does, and my heart breaks for the pain that you have experienced.  Not only my heart, but God’s also breaks for your pain. 

He is sovereign and He is good.  These things would not change if the outcome were different, I was prepared for it. Part of the peace is knowing that God has made a provision for those who have accepted His free gift of salvation.

This is the story of our little ones birth and next time I will tell you how he is doing and what his journey has been.  Thank you for reading and listening, as always if you want to talk about it or want to discuss something please contact me so we can chat.  God bless you and your family!